Do you speak European? (fwd)

[Jose Tent-manclus <jtentman@...>]

	Quereis saber lo que pasa cuando se quitan las h, b y v pues leer

 	Saludos 
	Jose Enrique

Subject: Do you speak European?

The following has been circulatingon the internet for some time. I don't
find it particularly funny, but enough people have sent it to me to convince
me that I am probably wrong. Anyhow here, it is, in case you know some
Europeans who haven't already seen it!

========



Having chosen English as the preferred language in the European Union (EU),
the European Parliament has commissioned a feasibility study in ways of
improving efficiency in communications among government departments.
 Euorpean officials have pointed out that English spelling is unnecessarily
difficult. For example: cough, plough, here, hear, bow, bough, through, and
thorough.  What is clearly needed is a phased program of changes to iron out
these anomalies.  The program would be administered by a committee of
top-level staff chosen by the participating nations.

In the first year, for example, the committee might suggest using "s" instead
of the soft "c". Sertainly, sivil servants in all sities would resieve this
news with joy.  The hard "c" could then be replased by "k" sinse both letters
are pronounsed alike. This would not only klear up konfusion in the minds of
klerikal workers, but typewriters and keyboards kould be made with one less
letter, a significant savings.

In the second year, bekause of growing enthusiasm, it kould be announsed that
the troublesome "ph" would henseforth be written "f".  This would make words
like "fotograf" twenty persent shorter in print.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
reash the stage where more komplikated shanges are possible. Governments
would enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a
deterent to akurate speling.

We would agre that the horible mes of silent "e"'s in the languag is
disgrasful.  Therefor, we kould drop thes and kontinu to read and writ as
though nothing had hapend.

By this time it would be four years sins the skem began and people would be
reseptiv to steps sush as replasing "th" by "z". Perhaps zen ze funktion of
"w" kould be taken on by "v", vitsh is, after al, half a "w".

Finaly, ze unesesary "o" kuld be dropd from vords kontaining "ou".  Similar
arguments vud of kors be aplid to ozer konbinations of leters.

Kontinuing zis proses yer aftr yer, ve vud eventuli hav a reli sensibl riten
stil.  Aftr twenti yers zer vud be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrion vud
fin it ezi tu understan esh ozer.  Ze drems of ze EU vud finali kum  tru.




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